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Lumbridge Royal Navy
Note: References are used to out clarify information, to point out references, to give additional information, and just for general humour. To get the full experience of this story, please click on every reference. Just click on the blue arrow to go back to where you were. The Lumbridge Royal Navy was created because of Duke Horacio's desire to rid Lumbridge of the reputation of a city of "noobs"King Roald had called Lumbridge "noobtown"., to secure the River Lum, and possibly start trading routes. The LRN eventually became one of the most feared forces of the sea, until their destruction in Year 148, and indeed, after their destruction. History At the time of formation, Lumbridge was low on funds because of the recently built Church and General storeActually, they were poor because Duke Horacio spent the money on "upgrading" his throne. Therefore, Duke Horacio decided it would be more economic to have a small fleet of experienced ships, rather than a large fleet.Actually, adviser Sigmund suggested this, but Duke Horacio liked to take credit for the idea. Formation (Year 134) Duke Horacio commissioned the bestFrom a certain point of view. They were actually the cheapest. CrandorianRoald didn't choose Crandorian for laughs and giggles. They were the best shipbuilders of their time. (canon) shipbuilders to create 4 mid-sized frigates. He used the highest-quality Yew wood from behind his castle, and paid the shipbuilders the hefty price of 4 000 000 coins to build the ships. It would take two years for the ships to be completely built. Meanwhile, he was hiring a crew. Pirate attack (Year 136) After years of planning, the ships were finally setting sail. The Crandorian shipbuilders brought the final pieces of the ship to the new port south of Lumbridge, and assembled it overnight. On the morning of Rintra 30th, Duke Horacio ran outside and saw four gleaming new ships, moored in the port. He broke down into tears. Finally, after four years of planning. and two years of waiting for the ships to be built, the Lumbridge Royal Navy was ready to sail to see. "Let's see who's a noob now, King Roald?" he gloated to himself, "I'll show him the power of Lumbridge!" That afternoon, the ships set sail. They were passing Port Khazard, when a lone pirate ship fired upon them. The ship Horacio Superior had been hit in the auxiliary mast. However, the pirate ship was slow and unwieldy, and the Lumbridge Explorer and the Star of Lumbridge quickly decimated and boarded the ship. It was looted, then sunk. The LRN returned from it's first reconnaissance mission, with no casualties and only minor damage to one ship. Navigator Faize wrote in in diary that night, "When we came to dock, and we told Horacio we were successful, he started grinnin' like a madman, mumbling something about beating King Roald. That man is insane, he is. And I don't mean King Roald." Invasion of Port Sarim (Year 136) On Septober 24th, Duke Horacio received an urgent message from their close neighbours, Port Sarim. They were being invaded by forces from Witchaven, who wanted to steal some famous Port Sarim jewellery and gold. Horacio quickly sent the Lumbridge Explorer to assist with the defense of the city. The Witchaven fleet had no cannons to speak of, but they had small, quick, agile ships, and depended on boarding the other ships and taking them over rather than try to destroy enemy ships outright. Their strategy was working to great effect, since the Port Sarim Naval Fleet crewmembers had little or no experience in swordplay. By the time LRN got to Port Sarim, many ships had been taken over by Witchaven invading parties, the docks were destroyed, and many buildings were burned to the ground or turned into so much rubble and splintered wood from stray cannonballs. The LRN understood their strategy, and instead of using cannons, used much quicker bow and arrows. The spoils of war, nearly 1 000 000 coins, were mostly given to Port Sarim so they could rebuild, but Port Sarim returned 100 000 coins in thanks for the assistance. Evacuation of Crandor (Year 139) On Raktuber 12th an adventurer known as "pkmage239486Obviously a reference to a real player name." descends into the Crandor volcano and unwittingly awakens the fearsome dragon Elvarg. Duke Horacio, remembering that Crandorian shipbuilders gave him an excellent bargain for the LRN fleet, rushes to their aid. All of LRN is sent to help bring the people of Crandor to safety. Unfortunately, he is not able to save them all. Elvarg unleashes her dreadful fury upon the remaining citizens of Crandor, killing everyone except for three MagesCanon. They were Thalzar, Lozar, and Melzar. See Fifth age.. Horacio is later criticized for rescuing shipbuilders first. A shipbuilder many years later wrote in his autobiography, "They had to leave my whole family, including my 99 year old grandma and my four month old baby brother at Crandor. They said the only people of value to rescue were shipbuilders and scholars. I only survived because I was a shipbuilder's apprentice." Regardless of criticisms, the Evacuation of Crandor is said to be one of LRN's greatest accomplishments. Desert war (Year 140) On Bennath 21st, the Kharidian Desert Armed Forces (KDAF) declared war on Misthalin. The Edgeville Navy, and Varrock Naval Service was sent out in a series of battles with the Kharidian Forces. By the time of the 7th battle of Menaphos, Misthalin had gained the upper hand, taking over most of the desert, setting up a camp at Nardah, and even colonizing Al-Kharid. However, the armed forces were wearing thin, and the iron ore mine southeast of Varrock was running out of ore for cannonballs and arrows. Menaphos was the final stand for the Kharidian forces. Sophanem was too weak to fight, and all other settlements had been destroyed, taken over, or turned into military garrisons. Menaphos believed that it would be taken over by ground troops, and so reinforced their walls and trained their archers. However, they did not blockade their port, and were vulnerable to an attack from the ocean. This was because the Al-Kharid forces had destroyed most of the ships they had. King Roald knew they did not have enough men or firepower to take over Menaphos. He had no choice but to ask his rival, Duke Horacio, for help. Horacio agreed, but not before negotiating a payment of 29 500 000 coins, and 60% of the loot from Menaphos. At first, King Roald mockedMocked is an understatement. Duke Horacio at requesting such an obscenely high amount of money. "How can you possibly ask for that much when your fleet only has 4 ships?" King Roald chortled "If somebody requested my help, I would only ask for 10 000 000, and I have 35 ships!"He said other things, but those have to be censored. Duke Horacio smiled calmly and said, "That may be so, but my Navy are four of the best." He told a wide-eyed King Roald about their exploits. Needless to say, King Roald was shocked and amazed. He grudgingly signed the agreement. Duke Horacio had a grin on his face as big as the first day that LRN's ships were built when he saw Roald sign the agreement.Also an understatement. Duke Horacio sent miners and smiths to make exceedingly powerful mithril and adamantFrom the Lumbridge Swamp Mine, in case you were wondering cannonballs, which would hopefully help them take over Menaphos. Each ship was given a invasion teamRead:Illegal, unlawful mercenaries., which would do the actual invading once they were able to secure the harbour. Everyone made good use of Varrock's dummies and Lumbridge's giant rats and goblinsRegardless of their sailing experience, they were very weak. to train their strength. Finally, on Fentuary 31st, the LRN sailed out to sea and near Menaphos. Their plan was simple. Misthalin would launch a decoy attack on the wall, and while their armed forces were defending the gates, the LRN would attack the ports and smash through their hopefully dismal sea defence. Captain Robert Belos observed the Menaphites going about their daily business. Training, and working. They did little else other than work and train their strength. Then, he heard a BANG!. That was the signal that the Misthalin forces were invading. His orders were to wait four minutes, then attack full force. Four minutes later, James Lewis prodded him in the back. "Sir, it's been four minutes. We should be going." Lewis told him. "You're right." Belos responded, checking the only clock on the boat, "Tell Wilson prime the cannons, Faize to alert the other ships, and the invasion party to get ready. Menaphos is going down." Kane Faize yelled at the rest of the LRN. "Get ready for the invasion!" he yelled, "Lumbridge Royal Navy! Tonight, we dine with Saradomin!A 300 reference." The LRN cheered, then charged forwards. A hailstorm of cannonballs and arrows annihilated the walls and any house close to the dock. Ladders were thrown down and the invaders surged into the city, killing anyone who was foolish enough to cross their path. In minutes the city was gutted, looted, and secured. The strength of the Lumbridge Royal Navy showed again, and they triumphed over the Menaphites. The war was won within days. Later, King Roald would receive a boastful message from Duke Horacio. "See what I mean? My four are the best." The Icy battle (Year 141) When Horacio received the money, he utilized some of it to add reinforced steel plates to the front of the ships, which could break through ice. This meant that they could sail not only during the summer, but during the winter as well. They could now go on more missions and fight more battles than ever before. On Wintumber 3rd Duke Horacio received a message from Mos Le'Harmless, stating that they were under attack by drunken pirates, who were dissatisfied with the bar service and decided to attack. They had heard of the many exploits of the LRN, and asked them for help. Money was no object. Horacio knew that Mos Le'Harmless was a pirate settlement, so if they were in trouble, then it must be serious. He also knew that Mos Le'Harmless was exceedingly wealthy. He sent a quick message back. "We're coming." The LRN sailed effortlessly through the thick ice, the new icebreakers smashing through any frost in their way. But when they got there, rather than seeing another settlement under siege, he saw a full scale battle. It was an enormous battle, splintered wood, ripped cloth, precious metals and human and parrot corpses scattered forlornly around pirates hopelessly screaming for help. Unfortunately, that was the least interesting of the scene. It was hard to ignore constant yelling, screaming, and other noises of battle. As expected in a battle, there many things flying through the air. Arrows, cannonballs, throwing knives, darts, broken pieces of wood, assorted body parts, etc. However, there was also ice, which added another dimension to the battle, because ice could also become shrapnel. Also, it was harder to move around the ship in ice. It made flaming arrows very useful, as there wasn't much water to put out the fires. Whole barrels of flaming tar were thrown, and many other flaming things Faize would prefer to forget. All thoughts of treasure and booty were forgotten as the pirates struggled to win the battle. In one unforgettable moment, a pirate (who wasn't exactly the purest essence in the bankRead:He was stupid.) decided to throw a barrel of flaming gunpowder. He lit the gunpowder, which promptly exploded in his face and knocked him into the main mast. The main mast fell and dropped the lookout who was in the crow's nest, who screamed and fell on the captain, who yelled "SHOOT! That hurt!". The gunner misinterpreted his exclamation as a command, and shot the cannon. The cannon hit an unfortunate crab, which luckily survived and ran near a tree, clawed a fox out of the way, and hid. The fox growled angrily, scaring an owl in the tree. The owl flew away and did not eat the mouse he planned on eating. The mouse took the cheese a rat was going to eat. Since the rat was hungry, it went to a boat supplying supplies to the battling ships, and it chewed open a burlap sack containing several barrels of quicklime, tar, gunpowder, and volatile matches. The barrels poured out their contents onto the floor, and the matches' barrel was rolling towards it. Thankfully, the captain's dog's toy bone was in the way, and stopped the barrel. However, the rat, a scavenger by nature, nearly killed a beetle in it's search for food. The beetle ran away and not looking where it was going, hit a parrot. The parrot squawked loudly, which woke up the sleeping dog. Now that the dog was away, it thought it might as well have some fun. It picked up the dog bone, kicking the barrel out of the way. The barrel ran over a Mos Le'Harmless monkey, who enraged, smashed the barrel into the wall. All the racket woke up some termites living in the wall, who came outside and pushed a fallen match towards the explosive mixture of quicklime, tar and gunpowder. This would be okay, because the match wasn't struck. However, the termite was hungry and chewed a bit on the match. The match's chemicals reacted with the gunpowder, igniting it. The burning gunpowder reacted with the quicklime and tar, detonating the barrel full of explosive mixture. The resulting explosion vaporized the ship, and destroyed any surrounding ships. The explosion was the largest in the history of RuneScape, even larger than Tyras' regicide. Shockwaves could be felt in Rimmington; the sound could be heard in Piscatoris. Oops.A loose One Small Favour reference. Captain Belos was watching when huge waves came from where a ship was moments before. Most ships were overturned or sunk as soon as the tidal wave came close to them. He saw the wave approach their ship. The ship climbed up the wave, then down. It was the Yew that saved them. Yew was heavier than oak used to build normal ships. All LRN ships were intact, although some crew members of the Lumbridge Star were throwing up.That's how strong the waves were: seasoned sailors getting sea sickness. the There were no other enemy ships and only three Mos Le'Harmless ships. All the ships cheered. Another Lumbridge success.Relatively speaking, of course. Most of Mos Le'Harmless was destroyed. Defence of the Ancient Statues (Year 142) In Bennath 3rd, the tables were turned on the LRN. Instead of attacking, they would be defending the ancient statues of Yanille, which would be come to be called 'DotAS'Reference to Defence of the Ancients, a custom map for Warcraft 3. They arrived at Yanille a day or so early, to ensure that they would have enough time to prepare. They set up camp, and got ready for the ogre horde invasion.Ogre horde is a reference to a Warcraft race. The next morning was cool and crisp. However, the Ogres were much more stupid than expected, and decided to walk around the dock to destroy the statues and do their vandalism. The Ogres were taken out one by one, and LRN met no resistance, saving the priceless old statues. Lumbridge Royal Navy golden years (Year 143 - 148) After the success at Mos Le'Harmless, Lumbridge was paid a medium sized fortuneA reference to the saying "A small fortune" and completely upgraded everything. From the cannons to the ramrod to the latrines. Over the next four years, a time of peace, the Lumbridge Royal Navy was contracted out to various parties and individuals.For a "reasonable" price, of course. Remember what they charged King Roald? The crew members of LRN became household names. Young kids used to wish to become a prince. Now young kids wished to become Robert Belos or Kane Faize or Mary Wilson. There were Belos, Faize, and Wilson dolls made. They have been interviewed 20 times. They publicly endorsed certain products. Ship repairers seemed to randomly give them discounts. Whenever they came to dock, people would surround them, and scream and try to talk to them. King Roald embedded wooden stars with their names on it in the main street.A reference to the Walk of Fame There were rumors of Mary getting married, Robert dating, and Kane abusing substances. Hate and fan clubs popped up everywhere in every city. Belos announced building a mansion.This whole paragraph is a reference to the stereotypical celebrity life. Out of all the crew members, James Lewis was hardly mentioned.Hope you haven't forgotten him! Lewis didn't seem to mind. While the media was obsessing of Belos, Faize and Wilson, he would quietly slip away. He seemed magically turn up at the ship whenever they were going on a mission. He was often seen going in and out of Varrock palace, particularly the library. He was never questioned. He would go into the library early in the morning, look through dust old books, and not leave until eight at night. Other times, he was not seen for weeks on end. Belos was slightly worried about his bookishWhich means nerdy. But Belos liked to think he was more polite than that. young friend, but Lewis seemed fine, so he pushed his worries aside for the moment. Then, in Year 148, it would turn out that James had his own plans for the future. A future in which LRN did not exist. Destruction (Year 148) "It's just another policing mission." Faize thought to himself. But he could not shake his foreboding feeling about the upcoming trip on Fentuary 22nd. It was just another sail down the River Lum, north through the wilderness, then south through to Yanille, searching for ships in distress and pirates. As they sailed northwards towards the end of the River Lum, he noticed that the shore was charred and blackened instead of the usual dark brown sand. He voiced his opinions to Belos. Belos disagreed with him.Another understatement. "I'm telling you, something isn't right!" Faize argued. I've been all over the world, and no sand is supposed to look like that! He stared at Belos. "We are supposed to help people, and make things right!" he yelled, "Right now Belos, things aren't right on that beach! We have to help!" Belos was shocked. Faize had never yelled, or even raised his voice at all. He stared at his shoes.They were expensive designer leather. I would have stared at them too. "Fine." Mary Wilson checked the cannon for the ninth time. Usually there weren't supposed to be any ships in the Wilderness, but you could never be sure. She made sure her cannonballs were ready, and everything was set in case a firefight broke out. She heard Faize yelling from upstairs. Faize never yelled. She ran upstairs to see what the problem was. Several minutes and arguments later, Belos was throwing down a ladder and getting off the boat. He felt something strange, like the rushing in your stomach whenever you cast a powerful magic spell. He heard a strange, inhuman chanting, the kind that you usually only hear near the Chaos Elemental. "That's strange." he said, "How can we hear the Chaos Elemental from this far away?" Just then, he heard a harsh, raspy voice. His voice resounded painfully above the chanting, and rang in Belos' ears like grinding teeth only sevenfold louderAvenged sevenfold reference.. It sounded as if sandpaper had been scraped down his throat several hundred times. It sounded like nails running down a chalkboard, only the sound formed words. They spoke.This whole paragraph is about his voice! "Leave." Belos barely heard it before the sound was whipped away into the wind. "Leave." Belos heard it again, clearly this time. "What was that?" Faize asked. "Leave!" Belos turned around. There was hooded person, wearing gloomy, dark black robes, vaguely resembling Lewis'. Suddenly, they were surrounded. "Ha-ha." said Mary Wilson dryly, "This is just like the horror novels my big sister used to read. Next, they'll draw some strange weapon and then we'll get saved by some strange heroes." Right on cue, each person drew a staff from their person.From where, I have no idea. Let's just say the was a bit sweaty from being near the mages' bodies. Supernatural energy pulsed around the area, lighting the nearby plant life on fire. Belos decided to go on the offensive. "You men are under arrest, under the authority of the royal throne of Asgarnia, for wielding weapons unprovoked against a member of a policing body." The leader of the men shrugged, and raised his staff. Lewis drew a dagger, grabbed Belos, and held his knife across his throat. "Don't move." the leader said, "Or my apprentice will gladly slit your neck." The other members of the LRN were worried. They couldn't see what was happening on the shore. They decided to dock and see what was going on. When they came back, they could see them, but could not help. If they fired a cannonball, it would hit Belos. They grabbed the best weapons they had, and went down. The charged towards the group. A man turned around on the spot, and raised his hand. The members of the élite navy were caught up in a fireball. They were incinerated instantly, and their ashes fell upon the ground, near a scraggly plant. Their ashes would fertilize the soil, allowing the plant to grow. The LRN would literally become part of RuneScape. As for the rest of the LRN, their fate would be not so easy. The leader explained about how the LRN was ruining the balances of the world by defending too many cities from pirates. The Edicts of Guthix were very nearly brokenEdicts of Guthix are a set of rules created by Guthix., and almost plunging the world into another God Wars. If another God Wars were started, it could have disastrous consequences, including Guthix returning to RuneScape to eradicate the world completely. The cult of mages had sent many hints and letters to King Roald, only to be ignored. Their final resort was to systematically eliminate all of LRN, and to ritualistically restore balance in the world.e.g. Destroy their ships. "I regret doing this, Robert Belos." said the mage. "I respect you. You are the best of the best. However, you have committed a serious and unforgivable crime. For this you are being killed." Another man stood up. He had a low mournful voice. Slowly, he spoke. "We should rejoice, for they has completed a long journey; the journey of life. And there is no greater boon than to leave this world with the imperishable crown of a good name. May Guthix have mercy on your soul.This is a reference to what a judge says to a convicted felon before the are hanged." Robert Belos was beheaded, and his body buried under a wilderness teleport obelisk. His head was put into a barrel of sand. The mages circled the barrel, and simultaneously casted Fire Wave on the barrel. The wood was burned in seconds, and the sand inside was immediately turned into glass, preserving Belos' head, forever. The head-inside-glass was later exhibited in Varrock Museum, to the dismay of Duke Horacio. The mages set up dams and emptied a segment of a lake. They buried Mary Wilson alive under the sand, carved the lake bigger, then re-filled the lake. Years and years and years later, after murder was illegalized in the WildernessA reference to the Dec. 10 updates., Wilson Lake would become a tourist attraction for thousands of people every year. Kane Faize was brutally stabbed in the heart. He was put in a concrete coffin, then the mages dug a grave near the side of the Wilderness. They buried the coffin, and filled the grave with concrete, sealing it to everything. Finally, the mages, led by Guthix, performed a months worth of rituals to restore balance to the world. And this was how Guthix worked his will. Thanks to Guthix, the era of the Lumbridge Royal Navy was finished; and balance was restored to RuneScape. Epilogue The Epilogue is not really an epilogue; it just has some more "in-universe" information. Ships Sailors The noble sailors of the Lumbridge Royal Navy. Only the crew of the Lumbridge Explorer are listed in detail. Lumbridge Explorer The Lumbridge Explorer is the flagship of the Lumbridge Royal Navy. It was the most recognizable ships in the world. Lady Lumbridge The Lady Lumbridge is so named because the crew is comprised of only females. Lumbridge Star The Lumbridge Star was named after a shooting star that Father Aereck, the priest, saw. It supposedly landed behind the castle. Exactly one year later, another star fell, and there were several Yew tree saplings. This was at a time where Yew trees were very rare and expensive. Now, the first shooting star in Wintumber is called the Lumbridge star. Horacio Superior The Horacio Superior is, obviously, named after Duke Horacio. Legacy The Lumbridge Royal Navy had a profound and lasting effect on naval warfare, and introduced the idea of an "élite" force, where only the best of the best need apply. To this day, many Navy gunners still adopt the "relaxed" cannon shooting style of Mary Wilson, who was renowned for letting her opponent shoot first, before she shot. The Lumbridge Royal Navy's legacy continued off the sea as well. Memorial sites popped up everywhere a battle had once happened that involved the LRN. Wintumber 3rd was declared National Termite Respect day, after the little termite that caused an explosion that destroyed a quarter of Mos Le'Harmless. King Roald was amazed when Rintra 30th, the first day of LRN, was declared Lumbridge Royal Navy day. Twenty-one years later, a man named Lexmarkman wrote "Lumbridge Royal Navy", a history book chronicling the exploits and adventures of the LRN. He won several awards for this book. A local poet later wrote about the death of the LRN: Although the Lumbridge Royal Navy '' ''is gone from this life; '' ''it is no less '' ''than it was before. '' ''We no longer see them, '' ''but they are still there. '' ''In influence, '' ''in memories. '' ''And they will be with us '' ''Forever. Footnotes Category:Organisations